PROLOGUE
EVEN WITH THE SWEAT ON HER FOREHEAD AND THE skip in her breath, she
didn’tlooksick.Herskindidn’thavethepeachyglowIwasusedto,andhereyes
weren’tasbright,butshewasstillbeautiful.ThemostbeautifulwomanIwould
eversee.
Herhandfloppedoffthebed,andherfingertwitched.Myeyestrailedfromher
brittle,yellowingnails,upherthinarm,toherbonyshoulder,finallysettlingonher
eyes.Shewaslookingdownatme,herlidstwoslits,justenoughtoletmeknowshe
knewIwasthere.That’swhatIlovedabouther.Whenshelookedatme,shereally
sawme.Shedidn’tlookpastmetotheotherdozensofthingsshe neededtodo
withher day, or tuneoutmy stupid stories. Shelistened,and it made herreally
happy.Everyoneelseseemedtonodwithoutlistening,butnother.Neverher.
“Travis,”shesaid,hervoiceraspy.Sheclearedherthroat,andthecornersofher
mouthturnedup.“Comehere,baby.It’sokay.C’mere.”
Dad put a few fingers on the base of my neck and pushed me forward while
listeningtothenurse. Dadcalledher Becky.She cametothe houseforthe first
timeafewdaysago.Herwordsweresoft,andhereyeswerekindanice,butIdidn’t
likeBecky.Icouldn’texplainit,butherbeingtherewasscary.Iknewshemight
havebeentheretohelp,butitwasn’tagoodthing,eventhoughDadwasokaywith
her.
Dad’snudgeshovedmeforwardseveralsteps,closeenoughtowhereMommy
couldtouchme.Shestretchedherlong,elegantfingers,andbrushedmyarm.“It’s
okay,Travis,”shewhispered.“Mommywantstotellyousomething.”
Istuckmyfingerinmymouth,andpusheditaroundonmygums,fidgeting.
Noddingmadehersmallsmilebigger,soImadesuretomakebigmovementswith
myheadasIsteppedtowardherface.
Sheusedwhatwasleftofherstrengthtoscootclosertome,andthenshetooka
breath.“WhatI’mgoingtoaskyouwillbeveryhard,son.Iknowyoucandoit,
becauseyou’reabigboynow.”
Inoddedagain,mirroringhersmile,evenifIdidn’tmeanit.Smilingwhenshe
looked so tired and uncomfortable didn’t feel right, but being brave made her
happy.SoIwasbrave.
“Travis,IneedyoutolistentowhatI’mgoingtosay,andevenmoreimportant,
Ineedyoutoremember.Thiswillbeveryhard.I’vebeentryingtorememberthings
fromwhenIwasthree,andI...”Shetrailedoff,thepaintoobigforabit.
“Paingettingunmanageable,Diane?”Beckysaid,pushinganeedleintoMom’s
IV.